Saturday, August 4, 2012

Adoration and Respect

Mesa Volleyball Taos Mountain across the Mesa

Did two months on the Mesa pass quickly, or did I just live a lifetime on the Mesa in two months? Or, was it something else completely? 

Castle Compound with Brother Brett
There is the meeting of culture on the Mesa; of Taos, Latinos, Tewa Indians, Earthship, artists, ranchers, hippies, extremists, fundamentalists, white trash, rich fat cats, methlabs, foodies, arsons, gangsters, convicts, hipsters – you name it. And then there's people from around the world who come to gather on the Mesa to learn how to build radically sustainable and autonomous homes. Just like the pueblo peoples of many many moons ago came from around the Four Corners area and Mexico to gather together to learn, teach, trade and do work. Such work would involve removing logs and working vigas from the Sangre de Cristo Mountains above Taos to carry back to Chaco Canyon for their structures. Evolution of human survival.


I wonder if the energy around this area has changed much. 

Mercury in Leo Retrograde through the Crescent. Three Peaks.
New Mexico is the "poorest" state within the United States. Taos County is the poorest county of this state. New Mexico ranks the highest in driving under the influence in the nation, and has the highest rate of fetal alcohol syndrome. There is a certain level of awareness and evolution present, just as there is a certain level, depth and breadth of dysfunction. The base here seems to be survival. Survival is key. Physically survive the natural phenomena, survive socially, culturally, emotionally, mentally, financially and spiritually. It's a large task.


Taos is a crossroads. It always has been. It still is. 

Buddhist Temple, Three Peaks
The planet, Chiron, is known as the Wounded Healer. I insist it represents the Master Healer. None of us are victims unless we choose to be. We have the power to take responsibility over our own selves, lives, survival and health. We heal ourselves, and this makes us master healers - all of us. Taos is a place that needs healing. 

Horseshoe luck. Setting intentions for this home.
The culture there has been hurt, and surrounds itself with defense mechanisms to protect itself. Even in the landscape it can be seen in the Rio Gorge cutting itself straight through the Mesa as Taos Mountain overlooks. It's just like anywhere around the world, in ourselves, and in me. All our hearts have scars. All our stories have stitches, and are stitched by the same thread. We heal, grow, and own our own skin. Even the chasms and crevasses are beauty to behold and never hold shame for.


We want to hide the pain, but that’s harder than picking out the cement from our sores. We want to make the pain subside by denying its existence, but by doing so we shut ourselves off from feeling everything else. We build walls and barricades to insure we don’t get hurt or get taken advantage of again, and by so doing, we cut ourselves off from what we want most. We do what we can to numb our emotions, and in doing so we loose our connection to our bodies and inner knowing. Enter the body mind disconnect.


Holistic integration of body, mind and energy. This is the work we are doing. That is what this is all about. Being Deliberate Creators.

Solid friendship right here.
Well, I reached full saturation, in every possible way. My being is permeated with Earthship Biotecture. There was no way to escape. I can’t get it out of my system, or out of my psyche. I reached a point where there was no room for any more information. As much as I wanted to stay to learn and build more, my being couldn’t take it. 


The honeymoon stage ended about halfway through.

Love and friendship. Doing amazing work.
Although for some, things remained the airy, dreamy theoretical ideals, and for others it was still an on-going party. Then for some, those idealistic clouds dissipated with tense social dynamics -  created partially by spending too much time together. It’s close to impossible to claim personal space, and the other big part was due to inadequate facilities for the density of people living in such intimate tight quarters. Whether a crew lived in a historically known party dwelling, or a far and high away place like up at REACH, or near Mike Reynold’s house, or at the old Press Office, or even at the social buzz of the HIVE – folks were isolated in their unique dynamics, agreements, conflicts and projections. Nonetheless, we did the work. We're still doing the work. These new friends of mine are amazing creatures!

Adobe plaster desert.
The reality of 31-40 people from many cultures and backgrounds coming together to live in tight proximity with people they’ve never met before is complex to say the least, and beautiful at best. Just because a crew of folks live together does not mean it’s a community. I was surprised to learn that most had never lived in “community” or “intentional community” before, and a few never have had a housemate! Some even had a strong aversion to the word. 


Despite it all, many tight friendships came out of this experience. Some of us opened our hearts to one another and grew exponentially. Some folks simply did not get along, and everyone managed to sort their shit, if even in the end. We found what we all needed down at our own core, and getting those needs met was one of the most challenging aspects of living on the Mesa. One had to truly fight to get one's needs met.



I love this picture. I love these people.
All and all, we had solidarity. We stuck together, helped one another by holding space in whatever way we could. We ate together, and unbeknownst to us, by simply sharing our joys and struggles in all situations, we became teachers for our peers. We became students to our peers. It was a mirror of permission and humanity. There is so much love amongst and between us all. There is no doubt that we would answer the call of anyone ready to build a house anywhere in the world - or for any reason we may be needed. Inspirational people with motivating and moving stories all bound in life by Biotecture.

Coleman. One of my best models.
Imagine these interpersonal dynamics of living together, commuting, working and playing with this group on a 24/7 schedule for eight weeks in conjunction with the interpersonal dynamics and culture of The Company and the newly birthed Academy. Space is a rare commodity in the wide-open desert of the Biotecture lifestyle. Ironic isn’t it? Space has become an enormous subject of growth in my own life as a result of this trip. Issues came up within the group and festered amongst us. It was too much for me . . . I had to do something.




After a while, perhaps due to my “sensitive” nature, or a feminine leadership style which values communication, integrity in relationships, cooperatively collaborating in problem solving and addressing and alleviating frustrations and conflicts to maintain balance, spoke up to request a platform to air tensions. In some venues this has really benefitted me professionally, and in others not so much. It seems to depend on the values of the group, business or organization. The court is still out on the Earthship front.

Seth sharing his input with us. Shaping and directing our Academy Experience. Foreman and instructor sitting and listening diligently. This was not part of the program. Thank you Seth for caring about us!

In my case with Earthship, I spoke up on behalf of the group to request communication to halt and address the overall bitching, make right what is driving these people around me crazy (including myself), and to offer information to the Administration that could potentially improve things for future students and the Academy itself. I requested an exercise with no attachment to the outcome. 

Seth teaching plastering adobe techniques. He offered his 20 years experience to those of us who showed up to learn.

The Academy met our needs, which I am so grateful for. It was a pressure relief valve for the group. It was one of those beautifully painful contradictions. It was well received, and it was rejected. In the end they opened up dialogue on the work site and issued a questionnaire / survey to us for early feedback. For my own well-being and that of the team, I had to speak up for myself and the group. It was worth being met with resistance because it took courage to do the right thing, not just for me but for my team, and for the future success of the Earthship Biotecture Academy program. Lou reminded me that the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Seth showed up for us. He was there for us. Thank you Seth.

I was supported and encouraged to . . . Embrace my nature. If something is worth fighting for, fight for it. If I’m mad, it’s okay to express that. If I'm inclined to talk about and share what is working and what isn’t, I need to do it - and it’s not my responsibility to process how others emotionally respond to me talking about the pink elephant in the room! 


I was empowered to own who I am and how I go with awareness. Folks who care about me, and who are willing to meet me half way are the ones worth investing in. Those who take issue with me and aren't willing to meet me along the way just aren't worth my energy. Sounds simple right? Yeah, after I break down the dogmatic structures I've been eating all these years! The good thing is, is that these structures are breaking down right now, and there are many of us doing the energetic work to co-create solid platforms to build up from. Alas, incorporating feminine leadership.


Sometimes you just have to call out rule number 7:
DON'T BE A BITCH!!!

Petaca build. Most epic thunderstorm of the year. Demian is ready to put us all to work and give us shit all day long!

My last and final critiques on the Academy is I realize that I went with expectations to learn all the elements of building an Earthship. If I could influence the Academy in any way, I would recommend having students do an internship with each of the core builders and systems specialists in order to get the experiential learning many folks need. There's the intellectual part and then there's the actual doing - with mentors teaching the aspects they know best. The reality for me is when I return to do another build with The Company, I will work under and or with hopefully three Biotects who have been doing this for close to 20 years.

I caught Demian's nature here. I have so much respect and adoration for this man. Pure desire to teach, and 20 years of experience to pull from. I adore this man, this friend of mine.

I realize only experience can truly teach you, and that working side-by-side with someone you respect, look up to and do so because they are a builder. Not only because they're a builder, but because they totally know their shit so stinkin' well. And because of this, they want to take you under their wing more than anything - this is what I expect to extract from the remainder of my Biotecture program. My desire.




I want to thank those who responded to my squeaky wheel. You all provided just what I needed, and it spoke to what folks in the crew were needing. 


If Anne wants to be a part of the Academy, she would absolutely be an asset! She's amazing. Instructors' input in the final reviews would also be beneficial input to guide the program as well (Lou, Amanda, Nhak, Terran). Working with experienced builders is the quintessential missing element from my standpoint. It was the true desire, call it an expectation that I still yearn for and hope to experience in my next build and or independent project.


Thank you all so much for everything and opening your hearts to me.

Teachers must be Builders
Another advantageous aspect for the program is feedback from Earthship staff and apprentices. We all want to learn and share what we know. Sometimes that takes some foundational organization and structure to be instated in order to receive and process that input. 


It is so beneficial when there can be open dialogue and opportunities for us to communicate, express and share ideas. Collaboration. Cooperation. Co-creating. It sure is not easy. But when people plan and change their lives to give it all up for a chunk of time - because the desire is so great to collaborate cooperatively to co-create something beautiful to live a better life. And then to share that knowledge to empower and teach others . . . that's enough to bring anyone to their knees.

Sacred lives.
When there are walls up against this, there can be major turmoil brewing underneath. We all need an opportunity to flex, reach out, grow, and create. Create more than anything - and on all levels.

Nhak as I see him. He really does give a shit.

It makes us happy. We feel empowered. It gives us confidence.

Luke. Way beyond his years. Lovely man.

It lets us express ourselves and not take ourselves so damn seriously. We open up to be vulnerable, to share the beauty in us, around us, and amongst us. It feeds us.

Simona the Czech Engineer

We are all tearing down walls to simply be who we were born to be. You know what? It is really fucking hard.

Nhak and Kristin


There are people on the front lines, at the forefront, doing this incredible work. It's truly miraculous.

Flagstone entry

Before I left Chico, many dear friends participated in an Anchor Ceremony with me. I knew I would be floating in the possibilities and would feel confused about where I was going or what to do next after my time in New Mexico, so I had a Ritual Adieu for the Adventures of Katrina at the GRUB Cooperative (my home). Thank you all for a beautiful night and holding space for me while I have been away.


When friendship becomes family.


Wolf Thump friends and fellow samba practitioners played drums under the walnut tree in a circle while rain sprinkled down . . . we played to the thunder and lightning, and friends danced under shooting stars. My dear friend, Pat Hull, played and sang in his unique, sweet and visceral way that captivates any audience. It invokes the familiarity and intimacy of love; it’s mature, weathered, and unafraid. It’s welcoming, embracing, spontaneous and fresh. It was a magical night of feasting, music, dance – even a little breakdancing - and fun amongst friends. The intention was set and all participated in the co-creation of my anchor. I know my way home to Chico from the vast desert sea that housed my Earthship experience.

Bottle wall: Katrina, Rosa, Shaeh

As I mentioned earlier, I became permeated with Biotecture; I became saturated with Earthhship. It is a part of me, just as I am now a part of Earthship. Now, all I have is time. Time to digest. With this digestion will come inspiration, exploration and execution of some if not all of the six basic principles at the GRUB Cooperative. (I hope.) Time will tell if we leave 1525 Dayton Road October 2013 or if we stay. Either way, it is the place to continue to grow and learn in the time I have there. 

Bottle wall: Katrina, Rosa, Shaeh

Also I will be returning to Earthship to work on builds somewhere on this planet, if not all around it. 

Bottle wall: Katrina, Rosa, Shaeh


I’m also one of a few Californians to help anyone who wants to have an Earthship built . . . I am a resource for you! An independent project still lays before me. You might be able to help me! All I need is: land, money and permission to build.



Wanted: Land. Money. Permission.

These beautiful minds and creatures in Taos have dedicated their lives to this work so I can be a catalyst for you. It is my desire to build elsewhere to spread the word, the technology, and the knowledge to the west coast . . . perhaps by doing something for myself. Or with you. There are no limits.





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